Sinking in?

Now that we have a positive beta with awesome numbers, I am accepting that I am pregnant. I wish that I could run around and tell everyone, but I'm just not ready for that. What if something happens? I have another beta tomorrow and I am hoping for more good news. I just keep having all these fears of something bad happening each step of the way. How do I stop feeling so down about everything?
Yesterday Matt and I were talking about when to tell people. I have no idea. Some people tell before they are even 4 weeks along! No doctor's confirmation, no ultrasound, and they are comfortable telling people. That so isn't me. I think I at least need to see the baby before I feel comfortable telling people.
Yesterday my belly felt so full I thought it would explode. I'm not sure what is going on, but it is making me nervous. I woke up in the middle of the night and stretched only to feel it really pull in my abdomen. I wonder if it is normal? I'll probably ask the doctor about it tomorrow after the second beta. Maybe I am just a little "backed up" and gassy. Who knows? I am just going to keep drinking lots of fluid.
6:00pm
So, today went well. I think I was just a little constipated. Nothing a stool softener couldn't fix. I'm still bloated and tired, but my belly is quite a bit better.
I also broke down and told 2 people today. One was Susan. She is in Sacramento and a good friend, so I know that I can rely on her to keep the secret and also be a good sounding board. She is also a good pray-er, so that makes me feel good, too. :)
The other person I told is Dolores, my co-worker. She started talking about why I was puking at work and blaming it on the building and everything. I then couldn't keep it back from her. She started crying because she is so happy for us. I'm glad I have someone understanding at work who knows. :)
Now I just want to sleep for a while and not eat much of anything. I have very little appetite.
Tomorrow is beta #2, so we will see how well this is progressing. I will feel much better when I know the numbers are doubling like they should be.

4w1d